AlternateIdea: Infected with the 5 Things Meme

January 16th, 2007

Infected with the 5 Things Meme

10 comments on 375 words

It seems Mr. Webb had it out for me and has bestowed upon me the 5 things meme. I’m not that interesting, but here goes.

5 Things You Might Not Know About Me

To up Dan’s story about getting bit by a dog. I was bitten by a monkey. Thats right, a real monkey. When I was young, me and my family were at some kind of Fair and a guy had a monkey. The man told me not to get too close, so I tried to pet the monkey and got bit. I still have the scar today. It was traumatic. Your free to laugh now.
I worked in a factory on a production line building furniture before I got into the web. I decided one day to quit my factory job and got everything I owned repossessed. While I was unemployed, I taught myself web design in the bedroom of my families single-wide mobile home in Mississippi.
I love politics. I’m not a Washington insider by any stretch of the imagination, but I’m very much infatuated with our political system.
2006 was the first time I’ve ever been to an airport or on a commercial airline. Besides the surrounding states, I had never really been away from home. In that year, I made trips to L.A 3 times., Hollywood twice, Boston, Ottawa, Montreal, Toronto, Chicago, Phoenix, Minneapolis, and Atlanta.
Me and my wife went to the same High School, it was tiny. The Kindergarten, Middle School and High School were all on the same campus. We never really spoke to each other during that time. Immediately after graduation we dated for 7 years, before getting married. We’ve been together for about 9 years.

I won’t be responsible for keeping this alive, so I’m not naming anyone. By the way, are you still laughing about the monkey?

Discussion

nate said on January 17th

Laugh?? Getting bit by monkey is like the second coolest thing I’ve ever heard.
Jina Bolton said on January 17th

What Nate said. :)
Justin Palmer said on January 17th

I’m afraid to ask what’s the coolest thing you’ve ever heard.
Thomas Aylott said on January 17th

My “free to laugh now”?

Ok, I’ll take it
Will Duncan said on January 17th

haha…that is pretty crazy, getting bit by a monkey. But next time a monkey bites you though, you’ll know to hit (B) and stickytag his ass while you run away in pain
G.Lindqvist said on January 17th

Getting bit by a monkey, you have to bit back! Always give back harder. ;)
Tarellel said on January 18th

Sounds kinda like my life story…except getting bit by the monkey. I laughed at that for like 30 minuets, man thats hilarious. You should have sucker punched him, hehe well at least you didn’t get rabies or something from it, right?
Rob Sanheim said on January 30th

I have a friend who not only was bitten by a monkey where he worked, but also was stuck by a needle that being used to inject said monkeys. He had to undergo testing for hepatitis and all sorts of fun stuff. Came back negative, thankfully, but lab jobs are no fun.
Justin Palmer said on January 30th

I’m a little disappointed that I’m no longer the only known individual to have been bitten by a monkey. I was certain I had that sealed. Injected with monkey vaccine too, I bow in defeat.
Nick said on February 15th

:) Wonderful and heroic autobiography! :)

Sorry, comments are closed for this article.

Justin is the Design Director for entp, the company behind Lighthouse, Warehouse, and Mephisto. You can check out his shiny stuff for proof of his super powers.

Beautifully simple issue tracking and project management. With a beautiful Mac-like interface, email and subversion integration, Lighthouse is the perfect project management tool. We took the suck out of issue tracking.
Web-based Subversion Interface. Manage Subversion permissions and browse through your changesets and files with ease. Warehouse takes the complicated and mundane tasks of Subversion and makes it easy.

Jun08

ActiveRecord Ported To Objective-C brought to us by Ninja Kitten
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May06

With the release of Opera’s DragonFly, IE 8’s Developer tools, Safari’s/Webkit’s Web Inspector and Drosera; and the Grand Daddy of them all, Firebug – we’ve now come full circle.
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Feb08

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DoubleClick and Define using Apple Dictionary


var selection;
if(window.getSelection)
  selection = window.getSelection();
else if(document.selection)
  selection = document.selection.createRange();

document.observe("dblclick", function() {
  if(navigator.userAgent.include("Macintosh")) {
      location.href = "dict://" + selection;
    }
});

A quick (and probably dirty) Prototype-based hack allowing Mac users to get the definition of any word by double clicking it.

Feb08

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A strftime for Prototype


Object.extend(Date.prototype, {
  strftime: function(format) {
    var day = this.getUTCDay(), month = this.getUTCMonth();
    var hours = this.getUTCHours(), minutes = this.getUTCMinutes();
    function pad(num) { return num.toPaddedString(2); };

    return format.gsub(/\%([aAbBcdDHiImMpSwyY])/, function(part) {
      switch(part[1]) {
        case 'a': return $w("Sun Mon Tue Wed Thu Fri Sat")[day]; break;
        case 'A': return $w("Sunday Monday Tuesday Wednesday Thursday Friday Saturday")[day]; break;
        case 'b': return $w("Jan Feb Mar Apr May Jun Jul Aug Sep Oct Nov Dec")[month]; break;
        case 'B': return $w("January February March April May June July August September October November December")[month]; break;
        case 'c': return this.toString(); break;
        case 'd': return this.getUTCDate(); break;
        case 'D': return pad(this.getUTCDate()); break;
        case 'H': return pad(hours); break;
        case 'i': return (hours === 12 || hours === 0) ? 12 : (hours + 12) % 12; break;
        case 'I': return pad((hours === 12 || hours === 0) ? 12 : (hours + 12) % 12); break;
        case 'm': return pad(month + 1); break;
        case 'M': return pad(minutes); break;
        case 'p': return hours > 11 ? 'PM' : 'AM'; break;
        case 'S': return pad(this.getUTCSeconds()); break;
        case 'w': return day; break;
        case 'y': return pad(this.getUTCFullYear() % 100); break;
        case 'Y': return this.getUTCFullYear().toString(); break;
      }
    }.bind(this));
  }
});

UPDATE: Bugs fixed. Thanks Andrew and Stephen

Also, some of my old and new code has been posted on GitHub. You might find something useful.

Feb04

A beautiful, organic animation by Flight404 created using Processing.

Processing in Action
Jan08

Aaron Patterson shows us how to define ruby methods which can be called from JavaScript using RKelly.
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Jan07

Dustin might not surprise you at your house with a book in hand, but he’ll damn sure send you his innermost fu in the form of a shiny yellow and black book. It’s an excellent read if you’re looking to put more funk in your functions and class in your classes. Check out “Pro JavaScript Design Patterns” by Dustin and Ross Harmes.

—I’m Justin Palmer and I approve this message.
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Dec23

IE 8 PAsses the Acid 2 Test for those not keeping tabs on things.
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Oct24

Mislav has written up an excellent overview on upgrading Radiant (which used 1.5) to Prototype 1.6. The article does a great job of showing how 1.6 is superior to 1.5.
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Oct19

According to the New York Times, the Daily Show Archives, with over 7,000 videos are online—free and searchable.
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Oct11

Telemarketer gets owned
Oct10

—Erik Kastner shows us how it’s done.

Making an iPhone app in about a minute
Oct09

Defining classes and inheritance in Prototype–Incase you’ve missed it, Prototype 1.6 has a new inheritance model.
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Aug21

Hurricane Dean’s projected path. The most awesomest hurricane ever.
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Aug07

How Ninjas Work

Who would’ve thought Howstuffworks would be able to uncover the secrets behind these illusive creatures.
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